eyes closed, one leg

ive been working on this for years.  it is not easy.  then an athleta catalog comes in the mail for beloved wife & there is the model doing the one leg with eyes closed, at rest, blissful, wearing something that is for sale.  in my one-leg standing career so far i have done that for as much as 3.5 breaths before the lean begins that leads to the topple.

i want to be as flexible as a 15 year old girl

so i'm doing the neck exercises (head turns) on one leg recently.  lots of failure, where i like to be with new stuff.  today i noticed (eyes open) that head turns below horizontal did not disturb one leg balance as much as above horizontal, horizontal itself being "ok" still it is all hard to do.  so i can look down on one leg basically no problem, but if i look up its like one leg with eyes closed.

what are the implications of that?  there is a vestibular component and a mechanical balance component, the mechanical can be isolated easily enough, i can try to align my hips & shoulders, etc.  the vestibular - i dont have "balance problems" yet there are mechanical positions for which vestibular fails.  isn't that interesting?

old people aikido - in the sense that the principles of aikido apply in normal interactions with objects, the object is the partner

dad is 87, mom is 89.  her habit is to sit there.  dads is to creep around all bent over.  he has been dealing with various householder stuff since they moved, kind of refuses help with it, she has had a series of medical issues.  finally he starts to feel like his world is stable enough he can spare the time to take care of himself, exercize, see doctors, etc.  he wants to do something about being all bent over, will see a doctor, will ask hopefully for a back brace.  

he wanted me to see a bar he hung in a doorway, wanted to hang from it, would i watch him & comment.  sure.  so he goes over & hangs, shows me what he does.  why did he want to do this?  thought it would be a good idea.  (used to do it, decades, didnt help.  probably didnt do it enough.  do anything enough you begin learning something about how to get something out of it.  did some doctor prescribe?  no.  think it helps?  think so.

explained that first the arms stretch, then the shoulder blades, then the back, he deals with that by lifting his legs.  plans to increase time hanging.  all that's fine, anything is better than nothing.  what has to happen if he wants to stand up straighter is to stand up straighter, all the discomfort & frustration while the new habit gets formed in 2 weeks to, um, years.

then he has a moment of lost balance.  so we talk about blackouts, which is when the blood to the head changes quckly, for instance when stopping doing something.  head swims, vision darkens, happens more as get older.  what to do.  find a stable posture that can be assumed with relative safety until the blood shift is done, few seconds at most usually, called it "a neutral position." a concept seemed to go in, he said he'd think about it.

and mom complained about falling while turning, i showed her how to break down the turning movement into pieces & do the pieces one at a time.  like when she gets where shes going she can stop, figure out which way she wants to go, which foot to move where, etc.  again it seemed to go in: the idea of breaking a movement into pieces.  that would be 2 um, transmissions in a session, as it were.  in the sense of an idea being presented & the presentee allows it to get through the brain-spam filter.  provisionally happy.  see what happens.

use of sword in yogoid mode

I have been sick with tenacious green mucus upper throat. 2 weeks of un-painful cough, no fever, some malaise.  there was some outbreak of reverted old patterns.  here's hoping that i don't end up as the 9 year old i once was.

missed aikido 2x weeks.

i've been using the sword as a guide to the lines in my AM stretch.  holding it in any position will always give me something to align with.  if i move a part i can watch the sword perhaps not move demonstrating that i did the isolation correctly.

going through the various stretch movements things are done that are absolute nos in martial, like bending the torso over a straight leg.  in martial the leg would always be bent unless taking a breakfall, but in the AM stretch the goal is to produce the stretch burn in the outside of the forward leg, so the positioning is "anti-martial."

then there's that kneel thing that may someday turn into that superyoga position with the head back & a hand touching the over backwards touching the raised toe of the flexed kneeling leg.  i can't do that yet but the girl model in the yoga clothes catalog can.

anyway, use of the sword in yogoid mode.  useful.

leg stretch

9/27/2010
for me it seems, professional sitter in a chair, i need some number of minutes of quad burn and long agons of ham stretch or i find myself irritatingly out of the zone. expanded definition of "comfort" & "fun" required to proceed. that burn thing has to go in the fun category. so related to "pain." it goes on through time, part of the "me" is going "oh, please, don't." means it & doesn't mean it at same "time."

in bendover i want to touch my legs. reason not immediately apparent, perhaps a desire for the comfort of contact in the face of imminent loss of balance. i compromise with my "self" on the 3rd bend and allow the left lower leg to be massaged where the adhesions are around that vein valve that is blowing out. candy for the good animal.

9/28
1. apparent ovalness of visual field because of lids, brows, cheekbones. actual field is circular. extrudable eye stalks would be nice, wouldn't they? even just to the edge of the brows.
2. clearly noticing the twoness of the visual cones, noted an "automatic" switch of attention between one field and the other, that tendency subject of course to modification now that "i" have noticed it.
3. forgot. let it go.
4. session of sword shomens with eyes closed, noticed possibility of straight line from hanmi to jodan, the opposite of "throwing the blade." if i don't do the movements as circle arcs but rather as linear translations the question of blade wobble substantially goes away. take it away from where it was then put it back. more or less. what's the difference between this way and the old way? wrists don't abduct independently but only in response to the lifting of the upper arms, i.e. the biceps run the show, the wrists maintain their positions relative to the forearms, the sword ends up at the correct angle up in jodan as much as it was in the correct position in hanmi. (hanmi is the wrong word for basic bokken position but too lazy/rushed to look it up - someone tell me?)

songs of layers 2

1. low back pain
if you sit down all the time
your butt sticks out
if you lock your knees
your butt sticks out
if you use high heels
your butt sticks out
where is your head
where is your head

why does it hurt?
lean in to the curve
why does it hurt?
get up get up
your butt sticks out

there you are in down low
how do your knees feel
are you wearing high heels
your butt sticks out

there you are
holding the pole
your knees are locked
how does it feel
your butt sticks out
your butt sticks out

tuck it forward
give your self a thrill
sit down on where you are
make yourself at home

don't listen to him
he doesn't know
you're gonna have to show him
more than once

good but honest
try to take it in
good but honest
let him think about it for a while

you want to sit in the line
walk on the line
talk on the line
cross the line
live outside the line
hold onto the line
hand them the line
step on the line

don't let me tell you what to do
your butt sticks out
your butt sticks out
take your time to think it through
your butt sticks out
your butt sticks out

you could run from the pain and to the pleasure
your butt sticks out
your butt sticks out
somewhere in the garbage there's the buried treasure

approach the line
draw the line
preech the line
hand the line
explain the line
hell with that baby let's go get something to eat

sound familiar?
heard it all before?
key in lock foot in door
out in the darkness where the life gets made
more more more more
more more more